Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners. Taking that note, I always ask myself how to raise a boy with such manners? I am a mother of 3 boys and raising them is never easy at all. I am going through hell just to keep my kids out from the world full of temptations and undesirable circumstances. But I am managing to raise them and instill in their innocent minds that life is being measured not with how much wealth a person is able to accumulate but rather with how a man lives harmoniously in the society.
And in the hustle and bustle of daily life, busy moms and dads don’t always have the time to focus on etiquette and manners. There are few of them that do not and did not even have the luxury of time to spend with their kids and just teach them the norms of this living world. Discipline should start at home. Teach your kids especially with your boys that behaving politely is a way of life. Good manners are a good habit. Kids who aren’t taught social graces from an early age are at a distinct disadvantage. An ill-mannered child is a turn-off to adults and kids alike; while children aren’t likely to be offended by a playmate who neglects to say “excuse me,” or “please”, they don’t relish the company of a child who doesn’t know how to share or take turns.
By that, I believe that raising a boy or your kids with manners will help them in coming up with how drastic the environment we live in changes from one era to another. Make your kids see how they behave affects the people around them. Teach them the golden rule: “Do not do unto others what you do not want others to do unto you”. It’s the best way for them to live at peace.
Acquiring good manners takes lots of practice and reinforcement, so make sure that you, your partner, and your caregiver are encouraging and discouraging the same behaviors. Always have the authority to tell them what is good to do and not good to do.
Here are a few manners kids should know by the age of 12.
- When you ask for something say “please” or “may I”
- When you receive something always say “thank you”.
- When grown-ups are talking never interrupt. If what you need to say is important and you need to get the grown-ups attention right away say “excuse me”.
- If you have nothing nice to say it’s best to say nothing at all. (keep your negative opinions to yourself)
- Never comment on a persons’ appearance (physical or mental) in a negative way. (Again keep your comments to yourself.)
- Table Manners (May I be excused, Blessing before you eat, napkin in the lap, chew with your mouth closed, don’t talk with food in your mouth, use your napkin to wipe your mouth.)
- Open doors for adults, elderly, women, girls. (Rule applies to boys mostly.)
- Yes Sir, No Sir, Yes Ma’am, No Ma’am
- When a door is closed, knock before entering.
- When you sneeze, cough or burp – cover your mouth/nose.
- When you see someone struggling to do something ask if they need help.
- When you play with something, put it back when you are done.
- Help set the dinner table.
- Always ask for permission before doing something.
These are just a few that come to mind when thinking what manners I want to instill in my children before they reach the age of 12. Raising a boy who learns the manners above is on his way to growing up to be a gentleman. Others may mention the noises boys love to make. Of course, there is a time and place for those, but sometimes boys need reminding.